Brightly colored robes are being worn and millions of tasseled caps have been and are being tossed into the air across the United States and throughout the world as graduates’ names are being called out and diplomas, high school and college, are being handed out.
A prerequisite for such ceremonies, beside the throngs of proud parents and relatives, is the graduation speech.
(Below) is a post from www.forbes.com that hypothesizes a graduation speech that should be given in this day and age, but, probably, never will be.
The Graduation Speech You’ll Never Hear
By John Rau
For years, I have sat on platforms, stood behind graduation speakers, and listened to commencement speeches, thinking about their general lack of transparency. I would fantasize about whether or not someone—anyone—would have the nerve to violate the sacred, standard convention of these events.
Would a person dare provide a bit of the “real world” yeast that we all know is needed to leaven the unwaveringly optimistic verses of typical graduation speeches? I would wonder, for example, if the required assertion, “Anything is possible if you set your mind to it,” could ever be followed by something like: “But, of course, luck has a lot to do with it. Hard work improves your odds, but some very lazy people have struck it rich. Being with the right company when it goes public or is sold will reward some of you, while others will be downsized after 15 to 20 years.”
This brings me to my next fantasy. Graduation speeches urge us to find mentors and heroes, looking at the examples of truly great people who have come before us. And, of course, such aspiration is useful. But it ignores the reality that, periodically, your challenge will be to hold your tongue and get along, until your initiative or good fortune delivers you from uninspiring or inept leadership.
Here’s another “real world” rule: What is obvious to you, looking up within a company, may not be clear to those at the top. It is not necessarily because they cannot see, but because you have the better vantage point.
Graduation speeches usually encourage you to see everything possible and tap unbounded possibilities, but the “real world” expects you to have patience and wait your turn. The “real world” suggests it could take a long time for your company to figure out that it is you—and not your boss or the chairman’s nephew—who is doing all of that great work.
In a similar vein, graduation speeches often convey the importance of finding beauty and ennoblement in the arts, dance, literature, music, and poetry. But that is more fantasy than reality. The “real world” is a place where most of us better find beauty and ennoblement in the seemingly mundane—the more commonplace arts, such as carpooling, refereeing little league, or serving snacks to children. For most of us, our primary artistry will appear, if ever at all, after our own children graduate from college. That is when many people begin to discover (often to their own amazement) that their parents not only possessed good judgement, but also contributed positively to their childhood development and character.
Finally, what would a graduation speech be without the challenge of change? Commencement speakers are required to paint a picture of a world unrecognizable in the next few decades, describing the critical role that college graduates will play in shaping this new millennium. But, in my own fantasy speech, the commencement speaker honestly points out that people generally hate change and with good reason. Incremental change may be positive, but massive change in a short period of time is hardly for the better. The pitfalls of social media prove it, as did the COVID-19 pandemic or countless corporate layoffs do today.
One of the keys to life—although it is rarely uttered on Graduation Day—is the judgement to figure out which changes are good and which are good only for those proposing them, and then incorporate halting momentum in that direction. Identifying self-interest in others is the key to prioritizing your own.
So, in the end, the fantastical graduation speech concludes with a few transparent statements:
- “Work hard, but don’t be surprised if someone else gets luckier.”
- “Reach for the underlying nobility in all mankind, but don’t feel like you have to convert every bigot or snob.”
- “Learn from good minds and seek out situations where you can be challenged, but don’t be discouraged when you end up working for the occasional dope.”
- “Think great thoughts, but keep your work area clean and turn in your reports on time.”
- “Value honestly above all else, but think before you speak.”
- “Make your mark on the world, but make sure your own children have at least the same benefits and values that you were given.”
It is this last thought that explains why we don’t actually hear much transparency in graduation speeches—because they sound too much like what your own parents told you for years. No audience of students will cheer for something they have heard so close to home.
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I don’t know if the cause is age/memory loss or the lack of motivational words being spoken, but I don’t remember who spoke at either my high school or college graduation or a word that they said.
I would speculate that the templates were those referred to above by Mr. Rau.
Perhaps “real world” graduation speeches are too dispiriting for students and their loved ones.
Perhaps platitudes always have been and always will be spoken at these ceremonies.
But don’t we owe it to our graduates, at least those willing to listen to, understand and be truly motivated by it/them, to get a “give it to me straight, doc” graduation speech as an introduction to the real world of which they are entering?