Recently Planet Improv attended a documentary film series that focused on mental health.
Coincidently, I had a troubling conversation with a student who made not so thinly veiled comments about wanting to commit suicide.
Below is a post on www.youthriskpreventionspecialists.com discussing the warning signs of suicide and how educators, adults, parents and/or caregivers can act when seeing or hearing the signs of suicide.
Warning Signs of Suicide
About 4,000 young people die by suicide each year. But this is only the tip of the iceberg. Every year, approximately 125,000 children – the vast majority of them in the 15-24 age group – are brought to emergency rooms to receive treatment for injuries inflicted while attempting suicide. Of deaths among 15–24-year-olds, suicide is the 3rd leading cause. There are specific steps you can take to identify and help young people at risk.
Recognize the Warning Signs
Here are some signs that a young person may be considering suicide:
- A suddenly deteriorating academic performance. Teens who were typically conscientious about their schoolwork and who are now neglecting assignments, cutting classes, or missing school altogether may be experiencing problems that can affect their academic success, behavior, and health and put them at risk of suicide.
- A fixation with death or violence. Teens may express this fixation through poetry, essays, doodling, or other artwork. They may be preoccupied with violent movies, video games, and music, or fascinated with weapons.
- Unhealthy peer relationships. Teens whose circle of friends dramatically changes for no apparent reason, who don’t have friends, or who begin associating with other young people known for substance abuse or other risk behaviors may signal a change in their emotional lives. Their destructive behaviors may discourage more stable friends from associating with them, or they themselves may reject former friends who “don’t understand [them] any more.”
- Volatile mood swings or a sudden change in personality. Students who become sullen, silent, and withdrawn, or angry and acting out, may have problems that can lead to suicide.
- Indications that the student is in an unhealthy, destructive, or abusive relationship. This can include abusive relationships with peers or family members. Signs of an abusive relationship include unexplained bruises, a swollen face, or other injuries, particularly if the student refuses to discuss them.
- Risk-taking behaviors. Risk-taking behaviors often co-occur and are symptomatic of underlying emotional or social problems. Such behaviors as unprotected or promiscuous sex, alcohol or other drug use, driving recklessly or without a license, petty theft, or vandalism, especially by young people who formerly did not engage in these activities, can be an indication that something is wrong.
- Signs of an eating disorder. An eating disorder is an unmistakable sign that a student needs help. A dramatic change in weight that is not associated with a medically supervised diet may also indicate that something is wrong.
- Difficulty in adjusting to gender identity. Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered teens have higher suicide attempt rates than their heterosexual peers. While coming to terms with gender identity can be challenging for many young people, gay and lesbian youth face social pressures that can make this adjustment especially difficult.
- Bullying. Children and adolescents who are bullied, as well as those who bully, are at increased risk of depression and suicidal ideation.
- Depression. Although most people who are clinically depressed do not attempt suicide, depression significantly increases the risk of suicide or suicide attempts. Symptoms of depression include the following:
- A sudden worsening in academic performance
- Withdrawal from friends and extracurricular activities
- Expressions of sadness and hopelessness, or anger and rage
- A sudden decline in enthusiasm and energy
- Overreaction to criticism
- Lowered self-esteem, or feelings of guilt
- Indecision, lack of concentration, and forgetfulness
- Restlessness and agitation
- Changes in eating or sleeping patterns
- Unprovoked episodes of crying
- Sudden neglect of appearance and hygiene
- Fatigue
- The abuse of alcohol or other drugs as young people try to “self-medicate” their emotional pain
Some warning signs of suicide demand immediate action:
- Talking or writing about suicide or death
- Giving direct verbal cues, such as “I wish I were dead” and “I’m going to end it all”
- Giving less direct verbal cues, such as “You will be better off without me,” “What’s the point of living?”, “Soon you won’t have to worry about me,” and “Who cares if I’m dead, anyway?”
- Isolating him- or herself from friends and family
- Expressing the belief that life is meaningless
- Giving away prized possessions
- Exhibiting a sudden and unexplained improvement in mood after being depressed or withdrawn
- Neglecting his or her appearance and hygiene
- Dropping out of school or social, athletic, and/or community activities
- Obtaining a weapon (such as a firearm) or another means of hurting him- or herself (such as prescription medications)
Responding to the Warning Signs
When you observe behavior that indicates there is a problem-whether the student is acting out, withdrawing, committing destructive or aggressive acts toward him- or herself or others, or exhibiting a fixation with death or morbid themes-take note and take action. Consult with your school counselor, psychologist, social worker or principal to ensure appropriate and quick assessment and treatment.
Many of the same signs that a student is at risk of suicide can also indicate that the student is at risk of (or is already experiencing) other problems, including emotional distress, mental illness (such as depression or bipolar disorder), violence, domestic violence or child abuse, academic failure, running away from home, or the abuse of alcohol or other drugs. You cannot always tell exactly what may be troubling a student and what the outcomes of theses troubles may be. But you can be aware of when something is wrong and take steps to get the student the type of help he or she needs. Below are some of the steps you can take to help students who may be at risk of suicide or of other problems that threaten their well-being.
Ask the Tough Questions
Do not be afraid to ask a student if he or she has considered suicide or other self-destructive acts. Research has shown that asking someone if he or she has contemplated self-harm or suicide will not increase that person’s risk. Rather, studies have shown that a person in mental distress is often relieved that someone cares enough to inquire about the person’s well-being. Your concern can counter the person’s sense of hopelessness and helplessness.
You might say something like, “I’ve noticed that you are going through some rough times. Are you feeling so bad that you are thinking about suicide?” or “Sometimes when people feel sad, they have thoughts of harming or killing themselves. Have you had such thoughts?” If the student says “yes,” it is important to follow these points:
- Be non-judgmental. Don’t debate whether suicide is right or wrong. Don’t lecture on the value of life.
- Do not be sworn to secrecy.
- Do not act shocked. This will put distance between you.
- Show interest and support.
- Offer hope that alternatives are available but do not offer glib reassurance.
- Get help from persons or agencies specializing in crisis intervention and suicide prevention.
Be Persistent
A student may feel threatened by your concern. The student may become upset or deny that he or she is having problems. Be consistent and firm, and make sure that the student gets the help that he or she may need.
Be Prepared to Act
You need to know what to do if you believe that a student is in danger of harming him- or herself. Walk the student to the guidance office, reassuring him/her that guidance staff know what needs to be done to get the professional help needed to deal with these feelings safely.
Do Not Leave a Student at Imminent Risk of Suicide Alone If you have any reason to suspect that a student may attempt suicide or otherwise engage in self-harm, you need to remain with the student (or see that the student is in a secure environment, supervised by caring adults) until professional help can be obtained. Let the student know that you care, that he or she is not alone, and that you are there to help. If walking the student to the guidance office, be sure someone can see the student right away, before you leave the student.
If your conversation with the student takes place outside of school hours, get help immediately. Call 911, 1-800-SUICIDE, 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or The Trevor Lifeline 1-866-488-7386 (a national organization focused on crisis and suicide prevention efforts among LGBT youth) and connect with parents or guardians. If a troubled student opens up to you about self-destructive thoughts or actions, contact that student’s parents or legal guardian. Do not promise confidentiality to a child when it comes to issues regarding the child’s safety. If you believe that contacting the parents or guardians may further endanger the child (if, for example, you suspect physical or sexual abuse), contact the proper authorities. Teachers are “mandated reporters” and are required to report suspected child abuse.
When in doubt about what to do, call 911 immediately. Be safe. A suicidal person needs professional help. If you are not sure what to do, it is certainly better to err on the side of caution and get professional assistance immediately.
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When I had the aforementioned discussion with the student who was making statements that seemed suicidal, I felt supremely unprepared and uneducated.
I did not want to say the wrong thing or trigger further suicidal thoughts or actions.
I listened to her comments, commiserated as much as I could and tried to express how valuable this student was to me, the school, her friends, loved ones and the world.
As it mentioned in the post (above,) asking someone if they are thinking of suicide does not plant that seed in their head.
However, according to a therapist that was a panelist at the Q & A session after the mental health documental films at the festival I mentioned earlier in the post, the most important question to ask is “do you have a plan (for your suicide attempt?”
If the answer is yes, help, either in person or via a help telephone line, is needed immediately.
It is our duty as those who care for and love our students and children to sometimes ask the hard questions and listen carefully when we fear or know that they are suffering the most.
It can literally safe their lives.