Don’t take anything personally: The Second Agreement
“Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally. Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world.” ~ “The Four Agreements” Don Miquel Ruiz
“Mr. P., you are a weirdo.”
This is a quote aimed in my direction from a summer camper within the first two weeks of summer camp 2025.
And, as strange as this might read, I take it as a compliment.
When anyone out in the world says, “I remember you,” I respond, “I tend to leave an impression.”
I write this with no arrogance, but most humans are forgettable.
But some of us, whether labeled positivity or negatively leave an impression that, sometimes, lasts a lifetime.
(Below) is a post from www.teenage confessions.co.uk that discusses being labeled weird as a child.
Defeating the weird kid label
by Immy
Weird.
If you’ve found yourself stuck with this label in school, then the first thing that I wish to say to you is that I’m sorry, also, get out of that school as soon as you can. Doesn’t matter how many ‘friends’ you’ll leave behind, starting as fresh as possible with classmates that have never heard of you is the best-case scenario. If moving schools is impossible for you then unfortunately the next few years may be sprinkled with fake friends and the occasional sympathetic glance from teachers.
Of course, there may be some of you that only experience the weird kid label for a short phase, and to you I say congrats! But for those of you that get to carry the label for the entirety of your school life: join the club.
So, I guess this all begs the question; How does one get such a label?
Acting out, falling too out of line of the norm, whether it’s because you have a niche hobby or your appearance doesn’t match with society’s beauty standards, you’re bound to have this label stapled onto your back for the rest of your secondary school career.
I’m one of those unfortunate souls who was gifted this label. It made me feel so isolated, almost like I was an alien with the tackiest looking human costume. Classes without my friends were the worst. No one wanted to be partnered with me and it didn’t help that I was also the ‘special needs’ kid; No one wishes to be stuck with a support worker as they’ll be forced to actually get some work done.
It is important to remember that this label was born from the fragile hearts of insecure teens that wanted an excuse to feel better about themselves. As long as they could compare themselves to those they saw as below them, they could ignore their own insecurities. This pattern of thinking creates mentally unstable adults that are so blinded by their own facades, they forget that they’re an individual who can have independent thoughts. Of course, I feel sorry for these people. Society trained them to fit the mold perfectly, but they lost the art of autonomy.
Eliminating the ‘Weird Kid’ label in adolescence can stop this toxic path to adulthood. The best tip I can give you is this.
Ignore them.
Now, I am aware that this is easier said than done. When we are young, the opinions and attention from our peers are the most important thing. No one wants to be that one kid who sits alone every break and lunchtime. You shouldn’t have to put up with their cruel comments either.
If they mock your acne breakout or your love of Korean dramas, just turn to talk to someone else as if they hadn’t said anything. Make them feel isolated, like they’re the one who is the ‘Weird Kid’. They want a reaction; they want you to retaliate. Eventually, they’ll get the message and leave you alone. Mission accomplished.
Eventually, this toxic view of students who just want to be themselves will become extinct. It will be hard but it’s necessary. We’re tired of this bullshit and if we can’t avoid the problem by moving schools, then this is the only option we have. To those who are struggling with this label, good luck and stay strong.
If you are one of those people encouraging the divide of ‘normal’ and ‘weird’ students, I have nothing to say to you. I’ll ignore you. Your opinion is as irrelevant to me as what I do in my spare time or how you want me to look.
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I applaud the bravery and wise beyond their years mental health of the actual teenager who wrote the above post.
Human beings label each other from their earliest to their last days.
If you want to see this phenomenon up close and personal, spend 40 hours a week with 40 summer campers and listen.
It often will break your heart.
It will often anger you.
It will teach you a valuable lesson.
Is Mr. P. a weirdo? I guess that is determined by what that word means by the person that uttered it.
When I am referred to as a weirdo these days, the word bounces off my chest like a bullet aimed at Superman.
I pray that those younger and much younger than I are able to endure this and any other negative labeling until they understand that “unique and memorable” is never a four-letter word.