Planet Improv has been using a review lesson for the midpoint of teaching our classes for years based upon the iconic television game show, “Jeopardy.” It combines the students’ pride of remembering specifics from previous lessons and the natural friendly competition of student team vs. student team. The overwhelming majority of students who have participated in the activity over the years have enjoyed it.
We used this review lesson in the sixth, seventh and eighth drama elective classes last week and, gasp/sigh, it got overwhelmingly negative reviews.
I was frustrated with the responses of apathy. As the students lost interest, they began to talk loudly amongst themselves and become physically aggressive. After accepting the behavior for as long as I could, I got grumpy. I halted one of the sessions early and had the students do another punitive assignment.
Upon retrospect, I came to understand that my bruised ego caused my grumpiness. I was so excited to do this activity with my students and KNEW they would LOVE it like most of the students in past classes. Alas, this was not the case.
I thought about pretending that this experience did not happen and moving on. However, the more I thought about it, the more I thought that a valuable lesson could be taught to the classes. I would be brutally honest. I would admit that the lesson was a bust and I would apologize for getting grumpy with the class that I halted early. And that is what I did the next class period.
(Below) is a post by Alexis from thekindergartenconnection.com that discusses apologizing to students/classes when we as educators are human and suffer from normal human emotions.
Why You Should Apologize to Students
I have some teacher confessions to make. I have bad days, I’ve been cranky, and I have been grouchy at my class. Why am I confessing these things? Because I know that ALL teachers have moments like this (you do too, admit it), as much as we feel guilty about it. The question is, should we apologize to our students? I say, absolutely! So, let’s chat about the real importance of apologizing to our students.
Sometimes we can get caught up in trying to look like the “perfect teacher,” and we feel badly that we can’t seem to measure up.
But I have learned that what makes a great teacher (Because perfect isn’t going to happen, sorry!) is someone who continually reflects on their practice and strives to learn, grow, and do better each day.
A great teacher is someone who truly loves and cares for their students and wants the best for them.
While thankfully the times that I have been “cranky” are few and far between, it always really bothers me to think of myself speaking to a child in a rude tone.
So here is another confession:
I apologize to my students when I have been grouchy.
Yep. I do. I refuse to just “shake off” a cranky moment and assume the child will forget about it later. “Oh, today was rough, I barked a bit at Betty, but she was driving me crazy!! Oh well… tomorrow will be better.” I no longer think that way.
So… when do I apologize to students?
I don’t want you to think I go around throwing out apologies like confetti, because I certainly don’t. Saying “I’m sorry” needs to be true and meaningful.
But, yes, I do apologize to students. My students are very young, so they need apologizing and social skills modeled to them frequently. When they are grouchy with each other, I always have them talk it out and work on it, so I try to model the same thing as an adult.
What does apologizing to my students sound like?
I may pull them aside when there is a moment I regret and say, “I noticed that I talked to you in a way that didn’t sound very nice. I am sorry about that, and next time I am going to speak kinder, ok?”
Or, I might say, “I was feeling frustrated when you weren’t listening to me, but I am going to work on how I say that to you next time.”
I do not talk “down” to them by using a small voice or small words just because they are young. I model a full apology.
Typically, I’m met with a smile and an, “It’s okay teacher,” followed by a hug.
Would I have been forgiven anyway without saying apologizing? Yes. They are 5, and what I love most about children that age is how quick they are to forgive. But, did it feel good to know that they had kindness modeled to them and were able to forgive in a kind way also? You bet!
So why should we as teachers apologize to students after moments of “crankiness”?
Because we expect them to! And because modeling behavior gets the point across much better than just telling ever will.
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Obviously, both educators and their students have their share of good days and challenging days throughout the school year.
The relationship between educator and student is just like any other. When one crosses a line into unacceptable behavior, that individual should acknowledge it, take responsibility for it and apologize for it.
As many valuable lessons as we try to impart upon our students, perhaps this could be one of the most important that will last a lifetime.